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Review: Tithe! Pay it or Face the Curse, by a Man Who Sincerely Believes Kenneth Copeland

 

Tithe! Pay it or Face the Curse

By Nkanu Ovai Nkanu

According to Nkanu Ovai Nkanu in his poorly formatted and unedited book, “Tithing is the believer’s foundational obligation for prosperity… Whenever you spend or eat tithe, God charges you to His court.”

I’m guilty of “spending tithe” (should we not say “a” tithe?), but I don’t think I’ve eaten it. It seems that if one did eat their tithe, the wrath of God would come about more quickly, considering the number of germs my mother claimed lived on a dollar bill or a solitary nickel. As far as spending goes, my debt to the court of heaven is now greater than I can ever repay. However, there’s a law firm that gets people out of trouble with the IRS. Perhaps I could give them a call.

“Tithing,” says the author, “is a master key to financial miracles.” This explains the mega-preachers. If we were to just give a bit more, we too could live in golden-gilded mansions on a hill in this life and the next. A mansion full of beautiful women. Oh, wait, wrong religion.

“No one escapes poverty when they do not pay their tithes.” Well, except most of the people I know. My grandfather died quite comfortably, but I doubt he ever tithed a penny.

“Tithing can break any financial curse on your life and family.” I once saw a Zambian villager, with hungry, sick children, give their sack of grain as a tithe to a group of missionaries. I can only hope that her god rescued her from poverty, along with her entire village. But, considering the famine in that area of Africa today, it’s unlikely.

Also, according to the author: “Pastors are post masters and the church is the post office through which your tithes get to God.” Will we be forgiven for asking, “How?” How, exactly, does a pastor “post” the tithe to God? Why does God, who claims to need nothing, need our tithes? If the powers of hell cannot prevail against Jesus’ church, why does he need his pastors to beg for funding?

I could continue to pick this book apart—the misspellings, the poor handling of the Bible, the fallacies, the superstition. But I feel sorry for this author. This book is the product of a crime that has gone back for centuries—churches robbing the poor, “fleecing their flocks,” through lies, threats, intimidation. Whether they tell the poor father in an East African village that his cow, wife, or child died because he failed to tithe, or they tell the widow living on social security that her children will prosper if she tithes—it is robbery.

Who benefits from the tithes of the believing, faithful poor? Men like Kenneth Copeland, whom the author thanks in his acknowledgements. Copeland lives in a $6 million mansion on 1500 acres, receiving a salary of $655,000 per year. Benny Hinn, another who is big on preaching on the “miracles of tithing,” lives on a measly $1 million per year. Joel Osteen has a 17,000 square foot cottage. Suppose Jesus will build him one that big in heaven? Franklin Graham makes over $1 million per year. Where does this money come from? It is not “rained down from heaven.” It comes directly from the checkbooks of people who budget in order to buy groceries.

Perhaps the pastors forgot to post the tithes straight to heaven.

Why did Jesus say, “Blessed are the poor?” instead of “Blessed are the rich?” His was not the theology of the mega pastors and republican politicians (these days, often the same). Pastors would rather Jesus have said, “Cursed are the poor, for you are lazy, and you have failed to tithe.”

No doubt the author is sincere; that is evident from the book. But he is sincere in believing and spreading a lie, a lie that has been told for centuries by bastards that Jesus called “wolves in sheep’s clothing.”

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