Nowhere Tribune

During my time in South Texas, Central Texas, West Texas, and the Panhandle of Texas, I’ve been around a rattlesnake or two. Like J. Frank Dobie said in his book, Rattlesnakes, they all have different personalities. Some are friendly, and some are bastards. Once on a ranch in South Texas, I heard a loud buzz … Continue reading →

My wife and I took a weekend trip to Colorado Bend State Park in the Texas hill country last weekend. Our plan was to get a full day of hiking in, rain or shine. The temperature was in the low 50’s when we arrived; very cool for May. It was also drizzling, and the forecast … Continue reading →

Hiking is a great way to stay in shape, get outside, and see some beautiful places in the world. It’s also easy to get started and requires little gear. Unfortunately, like most things, people like to complicate it. The last thing you need to do is ask what you need on a hiking message board. … Continue reading →

Let’s face it, men. To 90% of all women other than your wife *, sister, mother, great-aunt, and (maybe) daughter, you are creepy. This is especially true of men, like myself, who are at or near forty and slightly balding. Think about it. What do all the creepers in 80’s stalker movies look like? Sorry. … Continue reading →

On April 20, I drove to Wichita Falls, Texas for a strength lifting meet sanctioned by the United States Strength Lifting Federation. Strength lifting is different from powerlifting in that instead of bench press being the upper body lift, the USSF uses a strict shoulder press. Deadlifts must be conventional. And competitors weigh out instead … Continue reading →

The following is a guest post by Erin Haske of HealthFit Coaching. Erin has an awesome site and blog with tons of great information, so please go check her out. Hello, Nowhere! I’m so flattered to be invited to spend some time with you all, and while I can’t promise to make you laugh as … Continue reading →

40 Years with a Whistle: Life Lessons from the Field of Play By Dan John   In the world of strength and conditioning experts, Dan John stands out as one who knows what he is talking about. The summer between high school and college, John went from a lean 162 to a lean 202 through … Continue reading →

You’re tired of being the wimp on the block. You want to be feared by boys and respected by bikers, yet you don’t have time to become a true badass. Here are some tips to help you look the part. Gain weight. Think of the movies. How many scrawny bad asses do you see? That’s … Continue reading →

Blogs, millions of blogs. Some have ten-thousand readers, and some have none. Why? One reason is that some are well-written, and some are not. If Sally’s writing is crisp and clear, and Mike’s is cluttered and pretentious, littered with words like “pretentious,” people will choose Sally. Jericho is inspired and creative. Words magically flow from … Continue reading →

Who am I to give you tips? No one, from nowhere. I have, though, been blogging for over ten years. And during that time, I’ve been a reader of blogs. I’ve looked at hundreds, and I know what I like and what I don’t. Following are things that I notice—things that determine whether I come … Continue reading →

Other than my family and job, my main interest is training. Running and weight training occupy my free time and much of my thoughts. My routine changes, but right now I do a full-body weight training session every other day with running on the off days. I don’t program a rest day, as they tend … Continue reading →

While I live in a relatively safe place, I’m still interested in self-protection. Especially since I have a wife and children. It’s my responsibility to keep them safe. During my first meeting with my self-defense instructor two years ago, he said, “I can tell you ninety-nine percent of what you need to know about self-defense, … Continue reading →

San Antonio, Texas: Shaded under the sprawling branches of the 106-year-old Live Oak known as the “Heritage Tree” behind the North Barracks of the Alamo, renowned creation scientist Harry Hornelius said yesterday that the mission made famous by the Texas Revolution is “at most, thirty years old.” Nowhere Tribune’s Leo Hernandez, a thirty-year-old native of … Continue reading →

Ranger, Texas: Rufus P. Hadley stares across the prison yard where he’s spent the last twelve of his fifteen years with  both regret and acceptance showing in his large, brown eyes. “I wasn’t more than a pup when I came here,” he said, his gravelly voice betraying long, hard years. “I just got to running with … Continue reading →

Austin, Texas: As the State Board of Education moves forward on the approval of text books for use beginning in 2019, several politically appointed panel members want to see “flat earth science” presented as a valid alternative to the round-earth conspiracy. “Neither round earth nor flat earth science provide all the answers,” said panelist Beth … Continue reading →

A local CrossFit competitor is in the hospital after last Saturday’s games in Dallas. According to Sally Shortcake, things went south when she remembered a bit of advice from her coach. “I was in the snatch part of the contest,” said Sally. “I had the barbell overhead. It was my PR. (Yay!) Just then, I … Continue reading →

You’ve showed up at the rodeo, paid your fees, and signed the waiver. Now what? First, you’ll need to know what bull you’ve drawn. Your “draw” is the bull you are going to climb on and try to ride. Before you get to the rodeo, it will be helpful to familiarize yourself with the vocabulary … Continue reading →

The following is from my book, “Used to Want to Be a Cowboy.” Kowbell Rodeo was the only year-round, indoor rodeo in the state. Whether Christmas, Easter, or Super Bowl Sunday, the rodeo went on. By the time I was a senior in high school, I headed over from Joshua to ride bulls every time I … Continue reading →